(Disclaimer: These are my musings based on what I understand to have happend yesterday. I don't want to get other adoptive parents freaked out or our agency to be mad at me for spreading rumors. Notice the title, "What if?". At this point I am not sure what changes are being made and if and how it affects us, but I am thankful for my friend for bringing it to my attention. We're good? Great. Now you can keep reading.)
Yesterday, a friend who is also adopting from Ethiopia got a phone call from her agency saying that there are some changes coming through the Ethiopian courts. We immediately called our agency and were told that they are carefully watching, and will let us know when and what will pertain to us. But, of course, everything got me thinking.
The major change will be that right after referral, we would need to travel to Ethiopia to meet our baby and accept the referral to start the court process. Which means that as we wait for that all important phone call, we also need to be thinking about flying to Ethiopia within weeks of getting that call. Wow! We would then come home and go back a few months later to bring her home. Honestly, it seems a little unnecessary to make us do that, and I don't completely understand the reasoning behind it, but those are not decisions for me to make. If a change is made, we just roll with it. But a benefit would be that she would come home on an I-3 something Visa and would become a US Citizen immediately and we wouldn't need to re-adopt her one year after coming home. (Again, these are my personal thoughts based on what I've understood this far. Do not take this all as fact!)
My first thought was worry. A second trip would at another $5,000 to our costs. But God reminded me that He has carried us this far and He will continue to provide. I need to trust. Now I am excited at the possiblilty. That means that I could hold my baby in my arms in a matter of weeks. I could hold her and rock her and love on her more than just looking at a picture. I could shop in Ethiopia and fill her nursery with things from her homeland so that it is ready when she arrives. With one trip, I expect that it is such a whirlwind to meet your child, start to bond, prepare to bring her home, and also want to explore the country as you never know if you'll get to go back. Breaking it into two trips I expect will make it more relaxing, especially on the second trip when you go to bring her home. But also, my heart aches at the thought of meeting her and holding her, and then leaving her in Ethiopia. I'm sure the weeks in between will be busy with preparing, but I know I will miss her more that anything!
That brings us to now, where we don't know anything and we wait. Welcome to the world of adoption. It's a crazy ride, but I'm so glad I got on.
I think it would be so hard to meet your child and then leave. My heart breaks for that part, but I know the government is trying to do what is best for the children and that is what we all truly want.
ReplyDeleteOur agency said the reason for the change was because some people were traveling to Ethiopia after the court date, meeting their children, and then deciding not to keep them even though they were legally theirs. :(
Yep, our agency also confirmed all of this yesterday though they haven't given specific details as to what the requirements will be for the two trips. I can definitely see both pros and cons to the change.
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